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Iowa Dad

Parenting: God, the Big Bang, and Strawberries

I'll admit it. This morning, I didn't just avoid a tough conversation with my 5-year-old, I ran from it like JD Salinger from a camera.

Keep in mind, she had only been up for 3 minutes before she popped the question. She was groggy. A little cranky. It's the time of morning usually reserved for, "What's for breakfast?" followed by her whining about my answer.

So imagine my surprise when she sprung this question:

5-year-old: Daddy, who do you believe made the earth? God or the big boom?

Me: Ummmm.... What do you think?

5-year-old: God.

Me: Great!

I poured the cereal and milk, set it in front of her, and started to unload the dishwasher.

5-year-old: Daddy, who do you think made the earth!? God or the big bam?

Now, keep in mind when you're judging me that I tried to give an honest answer. I really did.

Me: You know, honey, I don't know.

5-year-old: Daddy, just tell me!

Me: I did, honey. I don't know the answer to that question.

5-year-old: Daaaddddyyyyy, just tellllll me!

Me: Who wants strawberries?

5-year-old: Daddy, who made the earth?! God or the big boom?!

Me: Oh, I don't know. Probably the big boom, honey. Maybe both did.

5-year-old: Oh.

(Pause)

5-year-old: I don't like blueberries.

Me: I know. That's why I didn't give you any.

5-year-old: Oh.

Me: Where did you hear about that?

5-year-old: Hear about what?

Me: Were you talking about who made the earth with someone?

5-year-old: Yes, Amelia asked me.

Me: Why did she ask you?

5-year-old: Because I was reading a book about the earth.

Me: Oh.

5-year-old: Did you know the earth is really old?

Me: It is? Like, how old?

5-year-old: Like, 100 years. A hundred thousand years.

Me: Wow!

5-year-old: Yeah.

Find Dave Schwartz on Twitter @daveschwartz.

Dorothy Ball

8:41 am on Thursday, June 7, 2012

God made the earth and all things therein. Genesis tells us about the creation of the earth. As I look all around, I see God's beautiful handiwork. One thing that amazes me is the number of people on this planet and how we all have eyes, nose, and mouth, and we can recognize everyone. Only One could make this happen.

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The Shill

12:50 pm on Sunday, June 10, 2012

If we are going to teach 'creation science' as an alternative to evolution, then we should also
teach the stork theory as an alternative to biological reproduction.

Miriam Timmer-Hackert

9:36 am on Thursday, June 7, 2012

Fascinating conversation! I tend to break into song:
"Science is real! Science is real! Science is re-ee-ee-ee-eeeeeel. Now I like stories, about angels, unicorns and elves, I like those stories, as much as anyone else, but when I'm seeking knowledge (either simple or abstract) the facts are with science."
If anyone doesn't own They Might Be Giants Science is Real I highly recommend it.

Now, I am the first to admit that science is influenced by the beliefs of scientists (proving whites have bigger brains etc) but in general I try to use science to answer how does the earth work questions and God to answer "Why do I have to be nice to mean people" questions.

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Miriam Timmer-Hackert

9:46 am on Thursday, June 7, 2012

At some point, to be true to my belief that people use "God" to answer questions that don't have easy answers (what is a rainbow, how was the earth created, why are women oppressed, which are all dealt with in Genesis, and what happens when we die, what is the point of life, who is on "my team" etc) I will have to explain the whole Evolution of God by Robert Wright. Highly recommend the book but it could be a semester long textbook there is so much insight and information.

Laurel Shaw

9:39 am on Thursday, June 7, 2012

My daughter started these conversations around that age and hasn't stopped (she's going on 7). They change over time (from questions, to her making absolute statements "God exists and I am correct!"/"There is no God at all and anyone who believes otherwise is stupid!". Sometimes she believes in heaven. Sometimes hell. Sometimes one and not the other. Sometimes she thinks all gods are real (Thor, Zeus, etc.). Sometimes she makes up her own stories (getting things all muddled up) and boy they are some crazy tales. :)

It's always difficult and always at least a little entertaining to have the talks when she starts them. And it's gotten a lot easier over time to have those conversations with her. We encourage her to ask questions and we tell her what people believe about gods (this religion believes this, this religion believes that). Can't wait to find out what she ends up thinking later in life.

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Laurel Shaw

9:40 am on Thursday, June 7, 2012

Man I hate it when I accidentally leave off an closing parentheses.

)

There.

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David Leonard

10:54 am on Thursday, June 7, 2012

Dave, you handled the situation wisely. Your way is a whole lot better than brainwashing an intelligent and curious child who sounds like she could become a scientist.

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Anne Carothers-Kay

5:29 pm on Thursday, June 7, 2012

And now for a bit of a different perspective: As a parent of grown children, I wish that I had exposed them to spirituality. In my 30s, I didn't have it to give. Today, I do and it is one of the best things that happened to me. That was my path to take, but I think my children would be better off today if I'd been able to give them a foundation that assures them that Someone or Something bigger than them will take care of them, no matter what challenges life throws them.

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Stephen Schmidt

9:16 pm on Thursday, June 7, 2012

In the beginning there was nothing, then there was something, then there was light, and a bit later there were strawberries. And they tasted good.

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Jesussaves

11:10 pm on Thursday, June 7, 2012

What a sad commentary, someone can't have faith without being berated by someone whom is brainwashed as they come.

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Laurel Shaw

11:13 pm on Thursday, June 7, 2012

I don't understand who is being berated by whom?

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David Leonard

8:39 am on Friday, June 8, 2012

Jesussaves: That would be "someone who...."

Nichole McDowell

8:41 am on Friday, June 8, 2012

My husband and I are not religious/believers. But a year or so ago, my son started asking to go to church, so I found a church close to home and started taking him.

My son, now age 6, asks a lot of 'big whammy' questions that are tough to answer for me to answer because I don't put a lot of stock into the things that he believes in. When he starts asking questions about religion such as, 'When old grandma dies, will she go to Heaven?" I use the response "That is what some people believe."

We talk a lot about different religions and different ideologies that people and cultures have. I want him to be well-informed and tolerant of the fact that not everyone will be believe what he does.

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Dave Schwartz

2:34 pm on Friday, June 8, 2012

Nichole,
Being around a university setting, there are a lot of different ideas floating around. It's been fascinating to observe how tolerant people are becoming of other religions, but there are still considerable freak-outs directed toward people who feel comfortable expressing doubt, humanism, or atheism. "Oh, you're Jewish/Catholic/Muslim/Hindu/Buddhist? That's nice. Want to go see a movie?" ... "YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN ANYTHING OH MY GOODNESS AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

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